Only you aging Baby Boomers will understand the reference: picture me as Ralph Edwards hosting the 1950’s hit television show “This is your life.”

My friend Jim fell in love with the sound of the violin as he listened to someone playing it on the radio when he was a kid 50 YEARS AGO. The violin would become a third arm for the next half-century as he studied, practiced and went on to become a contract musician playing with such stars as Frank Sinatra, Tony Bennett and Sammy Davis Junior as well as playing for many years with the San Francisco Ballet. He married a beautiful opera singer, Francine, and they had a son.

Life was good for Jim. He even owned a sailboat he often took out on the San Francisco Bay. “A sailor never jumps off board onto the dock,” Jim told me. “He always steps onto the dock.” But not long ago, Jim had something else on his mind as he docked his boat and jumped onto the dock at Tiberon. His right foot snagged a rope and he fell crashing down onto his right shoulder. Every bone was shattered and a half-century of making beautiful music with the violin was shattered into a thousand pieces, too.

Today, Jim manages his pain as best he can and is a member of a pain management support group at Kaiser/Oakland. He is part of the Unity of Berkeley Community now where he teaches people to play the Ukelele while they find their souls in a study group focused on the work of Ekert Tolle, Byron Katie and brain researcher Jill Bolte-Taylor who studied her own stroke as it happened -- and has become a powerful voice for brain recovery.

I think Jim must get his determination from his blood line. He is a direct descendant of Moses Shallenberger who was involved in finding the members of the Donner Party; hence Shallenberger ridge and Shallenberger lake at the summit. His is one of the oldest direct-line California families.   His father's father was a prominent educator in northern California and a poet.

I’m featuring Jim’s story in my upcoming book on which this lecture is based “Coping with Pain without being a Pain.” He has taught me “You find yourself in a state of awareness like you’ve never known before.”

 My friend Jim Shallenberger could not be here, but his lovely wife will be singing for us after I sit down. Francine Lancaster has walked with Jim through his dark, dark valley.

Francine and Jim are close friends with Takashi Tanemori who survived the 1945 atomic bombing of Hiroshima where he lived with his family. Takashi was a mile from Ground Zero at school when the blinding light from the blast changed history forever August 6, 1945.

His father, mother, grandparents and two sisters were killed in the bombing. He survived a suicide attempt, two heart attacks and stomach cancer, and now is blind as a result of nuclear radiation from the attack.

He says his anger consumed him for 40 years after many in his family died in the bombing,” But today, Mr.Tanemori says he isn't bitter. He isn't even angry.

He says "Everything I've experienced, each instant, has brought me to where I am now. I realized my life was spared for a reason."

Mr. Tanemori wrote Hiroshima: Bridge to Forgiveness, published in 2007.

Takashi, my friend, is the son of a Samurai Warrior and lives in honor of his father each day showing us all the way of “the peaceful warrior.” Tashishi Tanemori, former foe of many of our parents and grandparents and who is now our friend we honor you. Tashishi?

• Experiencing pain can make you a better person once you have learned by going through the pain.

I learned that when I found out about a man named Jack, he lives across the street from me.

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When he was a kid growing up in New Jersey, Jack had little interest in playing in organized sports. That changed when he got to high school, but football wasn’t his sport of choice. It was basketball; His friends said “Hey Jack, you are pretty good!” But Jack didn’t care how good he was, he was just out for the fun.

Football came into his life when he realized he could get a college scholarship if he played. He decided on Ohio State. His coaches soon realized Jack was meant to play on defense.

Jack would go on to become a two-time All America honoree and was named the National Defensive Player of the Year his senior season.  During Jack’s three seasons at Ohio State (1968-70), the team compiled a 27-2 record and won the 1968 National Championship. 

The Oakland Raiders selected Jack with the 19^th overall pick in the first round of the 1971 NFL draft.  The rest is the history of a legend.

Jack will always be linked to some of the more remarkable games in Raiders' history.  Perhaps the one that stands out the most is the 1972 playoff game against the Pittsburgh Steelers, a confrontation better known as “The Immaculate Reception” game.

With 22 seconds left in the game, and with the Raiders holding onto a 7-6 lead, the play that will forever be remembered as an incomplete pass in the minds of the Raider faithful began to unfold. 

Jack was named to the Pro Bowl three times (1973,74,75) and was instrumental in the Raiders' winning their first world championship in 1977.  Jack is the all-time interception return yardage leader in team history with 636, a fact often overlooked because he is better known for his hitting prowess. He played 10 seasons for the Raiders and the Houston Oilers.

Jack retired in 1980, but he would eventually face his own disability as all five toes on his left foot were amputated in 2003 due to a staph infection caused by diabetes. He  also suffered from an arterial blockage that almost cost him his right leg. He currently uses a prosthetic leg to walk around. I see chauffeured-driven limos pick him up often in front of his house across the street from where I live.  He works tirelessly in increasing awareness of diabetes. To facilitate this goal, he created the Ohio-based fund named for him Fund for Youthful Diabetes, which finances diabetes research. He also serves as co-chair of an annual fundraiser for the Central Ohio Diabetes Association, Celebrities for Diabetes, which is held during the week of The Ohio State-Michigan game in Columbus, Ohio.

Now, his full name should be obvious to you as I name the books he’s written: They Call Me Assassin in 1980, They Still Call Me Assassin in 1989, and Final Confessions of NFL Assassin Jack Tatum in 1996. Ladies and gentleman, the only man here wearing a Super Bowl ring, my friend and neighbor and pain hero Jack “The Assassin” Tatum.