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A Shameless Southern Gentleman

I grew up in the Ozarks of Arkansas. Ah...Arkansas, "The Land of Opportunity," "Bill Clinton Country," and where men sent a woman flowers simply to say either "howdy," or "I'm sorry." The women said "Thank you, sir. Most kind of you."

An Ozark Trail Near Eureka Springs, Arkansas
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GOOD BEHAVIOR

21 ways to be a gentleman

By CLIFFORD PUGH Copyright 2008 Houston Chronicle

June 4, 2008

In our chaotic world, everyone appreciates a little civility.

Now, more than ever, it pays to be a gentleman — admired by men for your ease in every situation and by women for your worldly ways.

A gentleman's manners are always impeccable. He dresses appropriately for any occasion, knows instinctively how to treat women, acts his age and is always fun to be around.

Yes, a gentleman follows some established rules. But in a revised and expanded edition of How To Be A Gentleman (Thomas Nelson, 160 pp. $14.99)author John Bridges insists that gentlemanly behavior is not about do's and don't's; it's about common sense and courtesy.

Take away even a few of Bridges' pointers, and your friends, lovers and business partners will be impressed.

A gentleman . . .

1. Keeps to the right, whether he is walking on a sidewalk, down a hallway or on the stairs.

2. . . . does not attempt to walk and send text messages simultaneously.

3. . . . waits for a woman to initiate a social kiss. If she leans toward him, he turns his cheek toward her lips. And when she graces him with a light, brushing kiss, he doesn't dawdle in accepting it.

4. . . . doesn't wipe away a lipstick smudge in the presence of the woman who planted it on him. He bears it, even if briefly, as a badge of honor, wiping it away later with a handkerchief.

5. . . . waits until a lady at the table lifts her fork before he takes his first bite.

6. . . . eats the garnish on his dinner plate if he so desires.

7. . . . places his knife and his fork on his plate side by side, as if they were the hands of a clock set at 5:25, when he's finished eating.

8. . . . always has an umbrella to share.

9. . . . never wears a belt when he is wearing suspenders.

10. . . . leaves the bottom button of his vest undone.

11. . . . never wears a bow-tie with a button-down shirt.

12. . . . owns at least one pair of black lace-up shoes.

13. . . . usually takes his shirts to the laundry but knows how to use an iron and spray starch.

14. . . . is careful about what he says in e-mails. He meticulously reviews his messages, editing if necessary to make sure recipients will understand what he's saying — and the tone in which he says it.

15. . . . knows how to make a grilled cheese sandwich at 2 a.m. and an omelet at 7 a.m.

16. . . . doesn't flaunt his newest gadgets, no matter how expensive or cutting-edge they may be.

17. . . . feels no necessity to wear socks after Memorial Day — at least in casual situations. If he is Southern, he may not even wear them to church.

18. . . . never wears the same pair of blue jeans two days in a row.

19. . . . puts the liquor away when he wants guests to leave.

20. . . . always offers to get up and make the coffee in the morning.

21. . . . never waits for something better to turn up.

How to Be a Real Southern Gentleman

By Sarah Wilson, Southern Writer
 

There are a few things that make a southern gentleman distinctive, and yes, they are distinctive. Unfortunately, they are also almost extinct. Isn’t that sad? Where did all of the Rhett Butler’s go? Our Southern gentlemen and southern hospitality are the greatest aspects of culture and lifestyle in the South. Well, here are a few tips, with a little humor thrown in, on how to restore that wonderful side of the South. Imitate Rhett Butler and restore some of the greatest aspects of Southern living by becoming a real southern gentleman.

  1. Step 1

    Get the right clothes.

    A real southern gentleman wears suspenders, suit, string or regular bowtie, and hat. The clothes are an impeccable fit. A string bowtie makes you unique and distinguished and for all of you whose pants have the crotch hanging at the knees, suspenders are the perfect solution!!.

  2. Step 2

    Tip your hat to the ladies.

    A real southern gentleman always tips his hat in greeting to a lady. The devilish smile is just a bonus. Also, remove your hat in the presence of a lady. They might wear their hat inside a building, but never at the table and never in the presence of a lady.

  3. Step 3

    Talk with a drawl.

    Greet ladies with "Howdy ma'am" while tipping the hat. (All ladies are "ma'ams). When talking to a group, you use the word "Y'all" and not "you all".

  4. Step 4

    Race her to her chair.

    You must anticipate where she plans to sit and get there first, pull the chair out, dust it off and offer it to her, especially if it is a lady whose attention you are trying to capture. Don't forget to help her get her coat or shawl off as well as hold it for her to slip into as applicable.

  5. Step 5

    Know how to appreciate a good meal.

    Eat heartily and don’t be too ashamed to ask for seconds! Southern women love a man with a good appetite and know how to appreciate her hard work in a kitchen. Compliment her and if she cooks like Ellie Mae Clampet, do like Jed and sneak the food in your pocket and lie about how good it was. You can feed the dogs later.

  6. Step 6

    Offer assistance.

    Southern gentlemen offer their assistance to women constantly. They open doors, carry groceries, lift heavy objects or anything else to keep a woman from straining herself. A lady never lit her own cigarette, a southern gentleman was always nearby with a proffered light and southern guys carried southern gals books to and from school.

  7. Step 7

    Flirt shamelessly.

    Southern gentlemen are ladies men and they love to flirt. They are debonair and charming beyond belief and know how to turn a lady’s head in the twinkle of an eye. They also recognize instantly when they’re headed for the doghouse.

 

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Please, NO Stereotypes!
 
I knew some of these guys, but I ain't one of them, Lord bless 'em!:
 

You Know You Are From the South If...

You let your twelve-year-old daughter smoke at the dinner table... in front of her kids.

You think Genitalia is an Italian airline.

The Halloween pumpkin on your front porch has more teeth than your spouse.

Last year you hid Easter eggs under cow pies.

You've been married three times and still have the same in-laws.

You think a woman who is "out of your league" bowls on a different night.

Jack Daniel's makes your list of "Most Admired People."

You wonder how service stations keep their restrooms so clean.

Anyone in your family ever died right after saying, "Hey, y'all watch this!"

You've got more than one brother named 'Darryl.'

You think that Dom Perignon is a Mafia leader.

Your wife's hairdo was once ruined by a ceiling fan.

You go to your family reunion looking for a date.

Your Junior/Senior Prom had a Daycare.

You think the last words to The Star Spangled Banner are, "Gentlemen, start your engines."

You lit a match in the bathroom and your house exploded right off its wheels.

You take a six-pack cooler to church.

You had to remove a toothpick for your wedding pictures.

The bluebook value of your truck goes up and down, depending on how much gas it has in it.

You have to go outside to get something out of the 'fridge.

One of your kids was born on a pool table.

Your dad walks you to school because you are both in the same grade.

You need one more hole punched in your card to get a freebie at the House of Tattoos.

You have flowers planted in a bathroom fixture in your front yard.

Ya can't get married to yer sweetheart 'cause there's a law against it.

You dated one of your parents' current spouses in high school.

You think loading the dishwasher means getting your wife drunk.

Your school fight song is "Dueling Banjos."

Your toilet paper has page numbers on it.